Fame: 0
Kids & Family
2020
The Accusation
The two boys (Andrew and Nelvin) are driven to a park. As they are being dropped off they are told by the driver that she is to return soon and when she does they better be ready to leave. As the boys get out of the car something of Andrew’s is left in the backseat but Andrew doesn’t notice. The boys get to the park and began to chat and play. Andrew gets serious and settles down to tell Nelvin something. Andrew explains that he just got into the possession of a superhero figurine. As he goes into his pocket he finally notices it is missing. Andrew thinks out loud and comes to the conclusion that Nelvin must have stolen it. An argument soon breaks out and quickly becomes physical. Nelvin claims that Andrew is wrong in his accusation. Things continue to escalate between the boys and Nelvin finds himself in a position of vulnerability.
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Reviews
Honestly this is good
I beleve that this overall is quite good, The cinamatography tells the story just as good as the script. I love the plot and how the moral ties into the story. I can't stop thinking about this film. One thing it is lacking is a better build up to the story, like how they got in the car. Good job otherwise.
Title and Theme
Your title goes well with the theme and the idea of what's happening here is one that could work. One boy is accusing another boy of something and it turns out to be wrong and then it starts all over gain. Take that idea and flesh it out even further. It feels like the plot just meanders and doesn't have a whole lot of direction. You have a good idea here, you just need to spend a lot more time in development really working your screenplay. Every piece of dialogue has to take your plot further
Circular Story
I like the circular story you created here. It's really thin though when it actually come to what happens in the middle. The idea is a good one but you have to really think through why every word of dialogue is spoke and here it seems to ramble. Nice reveal of the bandaid as him truly being a spiderman fan. I just needed more. Keep making movies and stretching yourself and the depth of story will come.
Nice Spiderman Reveal
Nice work with the Spiderman bandaid. I liked how the kids tossed the toy out the window at the end but isn't that the same kid who picked it up? No matter how hard, you have to go the extra mile to make a great film and it's things like this that ruin an otherwise good story. Working with kids is hard. I'd be interested to hear from the students about this type of thing. They did a good job in that respect.
The Spider Man Dilemma
I can see the cogs turning in the writing which is good but I just couldn't quite follow your thought process. Make sure that when you create the beats to your story that you don't move on to writing the screenplay until your story is fully there. The dilemma with moving on too soon is that it results in a shallow storyline. I was impressed with a couple of your shots, especially the one that moved under the bridge. Keep making stories.
Spiderman To The Rescue
This was an interesting piece and I think there were some nice little moments in there. I liked the bit when they were back in the car and realized the mistake. I was a bit confused by the same boy who picks up the Spiderman toy and walks away. Didn't we just see him get in the car? Still, the filmmakers built up some suspense and I could see the Hitchcock flavor in there. Well done
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